In a spectacle that blended political theater with comic book flair, Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem reportedly scaled the roof of Portland’s Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) building on Tuesday morning — clad in a full superhero costume and aviator sunglasses — to, as she put it, “remind Tina who’s boss.”
A Dawn Arrival Fit for a Movie Scene
Witnesses described the event as both surreal and cinematic. Noem allegedly arrived at dawn in an armored SUV convoy, emerging to the sound of a wind machine already whirring into action. “She didn’t even check her footing,” one DHS agent said. “She just stepped onto the roof, cape flowing, and looked out over the city like she was about to deliver justice.”
Reporters on the ground said Noem struck a series of powerful poses atop the ICE facility, her aviators gleaming in the morning sun. “Sometimes leadership means sending a message,” she told the press through a headset microphone. “And that message is: I own this skyline.”
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Fireworks, Bald Eagles, and a Governor’s Glare
The stunt reportedly included fireworks and a bald eagle flyover, though federal officials later clarified that the eagle was not part of the production. “It wasn’t trained,” said one spokesperson. “It just kind of knew what was happening.”
Inside Oregon’s Capitol, Governor Tina Kotek was said to have looked up from her desk, spotted the spectacle through her office window, and muttered quietly, “Not again.”
The stunt follows a series of tense exchanges between Kotek and Noem over the federal deployment of National Guard troops in Portland. Some political observers interpreted the rooftop moment as a symbolic show of dominance in that ongoing dispute.
Divided Reactions
Reactions across the political spectrum were swift and polarized. Supporters hailed the performance as “a bold display of confidence” and “a victory for morale.” One attendee told reporters, “You don’t have to agree with her politics to admit that was epic.”
Critics, however, slammed the event as “a taxpayer-funded photo shoot” and “political cosplay masquerading as leadership.” Social media erupted with memes, comparing Noem to comic book heroes, movie villains, and even reality TV stars.
“Somewhere, Captain America just filed for copyright infringement,” one X user joked.
The Grand Finale
After roughly twelve minutes of posing and wind-swept cape action, Noem reportedly raised her hand toward the sky and shouted, “Justice—engage!” before descending the staircase to thunderous applause from her entourage.
Her staff confirmed that Noem’s next scheduled stop would be Seattle’s Space Needle, where she plans to “oversee freedom operations” and “remind everyone who’s boss from a slightly higher elevation.”
While the Department of Homeland Security declined to comment on whether the superhero suit was government-issued, one insider summed up the event succinctly:
“It was equal parts politics, performance art, and pure Kristi Noem.”
